Gripe #7 - The Buck Seat

In late July the franchise gave away funny-looking Buck O’Neil bobbleheads as part of its salute to the Negro Leagues. I thought it would have been much more in keeping with their regard for O’Neil’s spirit if they’d given away a Buck Seat bobblehead. The figurine would have been some random white guy, but if you take it to work with you it organizes your desk accessories into a charity golf tournament.

Perhaps they could even make it a series. Buck Seat bobblehead number two: the founder, president, CEO and CFO of the Hey My Kid Has Cancer Foundation. This one honors grief-stricken parents who create their own micro-charities rather than minimizing overhead by focusing their efforts on fundraising for an established organization. I’m sure some of them are legit or at least well-intentioned. I’m also sure some of them are profit-making vanity projects. Type “start your own charity” into your favorite search engine and see if the results you get give off a strong “scam” vibe.

And of course we can’t go without the Soccer League Coach bobblehead. Though these folks deserve some recognition for their efforts to support youth fitness (especially those who work to promote the glory-free world of girls’ sports), we should also recognize that many of them are gym teachers or other school officials who get paid to do what they do. That cuts substantially into the “goodness of their hearts” element.

I’m not saying they should never put a white person in the seat. Not everybody is a Congressional Medal of Honor winner. I’m sure charity golf tournaments are good things. Cancer sucks, and I feel genuinely sorry for anyone with an ill family member. I’m not against teachers or softball coaches. It’s just that most of the seat’s occupants seem thoroughly unremarkable, notable for doing little more than their jobs. Any day now I expect the stadium announcer to identify the Buck Seat honoree as “Cletus Thudpucker, who has been a sanitation worker in Blue Springs for the last 20 years. And if you don’t think that’s important, think of what Blue Springs would be like if nobody picked up the trash.”