Game 24 vs. Minnesota

Thanks to my recent trip to Chicago, more than a week has passed between the game and this entry. To make matters worse, the extreme heat forced me to leave my iPad at home and score on paper. Thus I don’t have a super complete record of the game. On the other hand, the game wasn’t super memorable.

The highlight was the Royals debut of Jeremy Guthrie, whom we got in a trade with Colorado in which we unloaded Jonathan Sanchez. On paper it looked like a fairly even swap of equally dreadful players, but at least we could hope that Guthrie looked worse than he really was thanks to starts in Denver’s rare air.

Nope. He did fine in the first, but Ryan Doumit led off the second with a home run. Then in the third Minnesota really went to town on us, scoring four on hits and walks. Guthrie settled down and threw shut-out ball in the third and fourth, but of course by then we were trailing by quite a distance.

Tim Collins came in to start the sixth, giving up another solo shot to Doumit. Though we put together some offense in the eighth and ninth – including home runs by Billy Butler and Yuniesky Betancourt – it was another case of too little too late. We don’t come back from deficits. We just don’t.

The Goat of the Game was second base umpire D.J. Reyburn. He made a bad call on a steal attempt by Alcides Escobar in the first. He made an even worse call on a fielder’s choice in the seventh. Then in the ninth he ejected Escobar (and Ned Yost as well). To be fair, Escobar getting caught stealing and then grounding into a fielder’s choice were both close calls, and most likely the latter wasn’t connected to the player’s griping about the former. And as an extension to the official comments for Rule 9.02(c), players aren’t supposed to keep griping about calls innings later. Still, Reyburn should have been able to account for the heat, the players’ frustrations and the very real possibility that he blew one or both of the calls.

So perhaps it’s for the best that the record of this one is somewhat incomplete. There’s no box score, as the iPad generates those automatically. But the Buck seat was another “Hey, My Kid’s Got Cancer” W-, the color guard was KU Air Force ROTC, and the anthem performance was good (and not accompanied by any audible “Chiefs!” at the end).

Game 23 vs. Minnesota

As of the end of this debacle, we’re officially halfway through the six Twins games for which we have tickets. So far we’re zero for three. It would be really, really nice to see them beat Minnesota just once this year. I know we got spoiled last year when we only had to sit through one Twins game (and that without their good luck charm, Joe Mauer). But if this ofer is how we pay for 2011, the price seems a bit steep.

Luke Hochevar quickly settled into one of his weird patterns. For the first four innings he got the first two batters no sweat, but then he’d falter before recording the third out. For the most part it was more of an annoyance than an actual problem, except in the second when the third batter – Darin Mastroianni – smacked one over the fence.

In the fourth through seventh Hochevar finally settled down and pitched a good game, getting all nine batters. He even did an impressive job of fielding a hard liner from the inestimable Trevor Plouffe.

Unfortunately, the Royals weren’t having much success against Nick Blackburn, who’s been struggling this season but seemed to be on top of his game tonight. At the seventh inning stretch the Twins’ homer in the second was the only run scored by either team.

Then came the double that tied the game yet proved to be our undoing. Yuniesky Betancourt doubled, scoring Eric Hosmer from first. That was great because it gave us both “at least it wasn’t a shutout” and “at least we were tied at one point” on the Dang Scale.

On the other hand, it forced a shift on defense. Hochevar had been throwing a reasonably good game, but he was at 109 pitches by the end of the seventh. Though he might have stayed in when trailing by one, the tie prompted Ned Yost to go to the bullpen.

Though that’s been the kiss of death on many occasions, Kelvin Herrera and Greg Holland actually did okay. They supplied a few “exciting” moments but prevented Minnesota from scoring. Oddly, it was the Iron Man himself who blew it in the 11th. Joe Mauer hit a lead-off double to the great enjoyment of the fans in the stands who seemed to mostly be Minnesota fans at that point. Then Josh Willingham singled, which was enough to score Mauer.

The bad part was that Mauer crossed the plate without a throw from right field. Jeff Francoeur was in close enough and appeared to have plenty of time to at least attempt to gun down the runner. But no, even though the go-ahead run ultimately cost us the game.

That alone would have been enough to make Frenchy a fair candidate for Goat of the Game. But he also had a flubbed ball in the corner that allowed Mastroianni to stretch a double into a triple in the tenth. Way back in the third he tried to catch Mauer lollygagging it to first on a single, but that bit of aggressive play didn’t really make up for the costly bungling in the extra innings.

We nearly made a comeback in the bottom of the 11th. Alcides Escobar led off with another double, giving Billy Butler the chance to hit another walk-off blast. But of course that was too much to hope for. He sacrificed Escobar to third, but then Mike Moustakas grounded into a fielder’s choice that got the runner at the plate. Another ground out and it was over.

Overall it wasn’t a terrible game. Moustakas made a couple of noteworthy plays. Escobar stretched a single into a double with a little aggressive base-running. Even Betancourt made a good play in the fifth that partially offset more Betancourty fielding in the first. It’s just so frustrating to keep losing to one of the few teams in the majors that should be worse than we are.

The box score:

TWINS (2) AT ROYALS (1)

TWINS                AB  R  H BI  ROYALS               AB  R  H BI
Ben Revere            5  0  1  0  Alex Gordon           5  0  0  0  
Jamey Carroll         5  0  0  0  Alcides Escobar       5  0  3  0  
Joe Mauer             4  1  3  0  Billy Butler          5  0  0  0  
Josh Willingham       5  0  2  1  Mike Moustakas        5  0  1  0  
Justin Morneau        5  0  0  0  Lorenzo Cain          4  0  1  0  
Trevor Plouffe        3  0  0  0   Jarrod Dyson         1  0  0  0  
 Brian Dozier         2  0  0  0  Eric Hosmer           4  1  1  0  
Ryan Doumit           4  0  1  0  Jeff Francoeur        4  0  1  0  
Darin Mastroianni     4  1  2  1  Salvador Perez        4  0  1  0  
Alexi Casilla         4  0  0  0  Yuniesky Betancourt   3  0  1  1  
                                   Chris Getz           1  0  0  0  
TOTALS               41  2  9  2  TOTALS               41  1  9  1

TWINS                         010 000 000 01 -- 2  
ROYALS                        000 000 100 00 -- 1  

LOB--TWINS 7, ROYALS 7. 2B--Joe Mauer, Ryan Doumit, Yuniesky
Betancourt, Alcides Escobar (2). 3B--Darin Mastroianni.
HR--Darin Mastroianni. SB--Ben Revere.

 TWINS                           IP    H    R   ER   BB   SO   HR
Nick Blackburn                6 2-3    7    1    1    0    2    0
Tyler Robertson               0 1-3    0    0    0    0    1    0
Jared Burton                      1    1    0    0    0    0    0
Casey Fien                        2    0    0    0    0    2    0
Glen Perkins                      1    1    0    0    0    0    0
 ROYALS                     
Luke Hochevar                     7    5    1    1    0    6    1
Kelvin Herrera                    1    1    0    0    1    1    0
Greg Holland                      2    1    0    0    0    4    0
Jonathan Broxton                  1    2    1    1    0    1    0

SO--Jamey Carroll (2), Joe Mauer, Justin Morneau, Alexi
Casilla, Ryan Doumit, Trevor Plouffe, Ben Revere, Darin
Mastroianni (2), Brian Dozier (2), Yuniesky Betancourt, Alex
Gordon (2), Lorenzo Cain, Eric Hosmer. BB--Joe Mauer.

NOTES: Dollar Dogs and Fireworks Friday

LOCATION: Kauffman Stadium

CONDITION: Dry

WEATHER: Hot, Clear

Buck seat: W-- (JCCC guidance counselor)
Guard: USN
Anthem: Country-fied

Umpires
H: Reyburn
1: Kellogg
2: Cooper
3: Foster

Time: 7:09
Temp: 93

Game 22 vs. Seattle

With the thermometer cresting 103 at game time, we could be reasonably sure that we were in for a squirrelly experience. And the teams didn’t disappoint.

At least it was a treat to see an actual pitcher take the mound for us. Bruce Chen threw well through five. He struck out all three batters in the first, and other than giving up a couple of long balls and a hit here and there, he continued to perform well for the next four. The bullpen was its usual mixed bag, allowing the Mariners to tie the game and depriving Chen of the win he really should have gotten.

Beyond that, it was a night for strange doings in the field and at the plate. One of the main themes was the Very Close Foul. The stat is a little hard to determine with precision, but basically it measures how many foul balls land in significant proximity to our seats. Given our location, it takes some doing to wing a ball up over the backstop and exactly into our area. Thus we get something that qualifies maybe once every four or five games. Tonight we got three, two of which were during one Dustin Ackley at bat.

Broken bats also played a couple of significant roles. In the bottom of the second Alex Gordon hit one of those singles that probably would have been an out if his bat hadn’t splintered and affected the ball’s trajectory. Then in the fourth poor Mike Moustakas got stuck fielding a grounder with both ball and bat flying directly at him. To his credit, he made the play. Mooooose!

Otherwise, however, we seemed to really struggle on defense. Balls up the middle proved to be particular headaches, with both Alcides Escobar and Chris Getz flubbing grounders they might have fielded cleanly on a cooler evening. And despite his prowess at the plate and speed in post-game interviews, Lorenzo Cain seems to have a real problem picking up balls in center.

Mostly by playing solid station-to-station baseball, we took a good-sized lead into the seventh. But the bullpen faltered, the heat started to take its toll, and three Seattle runs later the game was tied. The Mariners threatened to take the lead in the eighth when Brendan Ryan tripled. But then Ackley grounded a little too hard to Getz, who fired it in for a close out at the plate.

In the bottom of the ninth things were looking seriously like sweaty extras. But then miracle of miracles, Billy Butler squeaked a lead-off, walk-off home run over the fence in center. Watching the jubilation on the field was one of the best moments of the season to date.

Needless to say, that was the Play of the Game. The Player of the Game was Getz. Though his fielding wasn’t the best, he was unusually aggressive on offense. In the second he bunted and ran it out for a single. Then in the sixth he caught the Mariners by surprise again by holding at second until the shortstop committed to first and then making a mad dash for third. The move startled everyone just long enough for him to slide in. Too bad they didn’t score him.

The Person of the Game (as umpires aren’t players) was Jim Joyce. Though the stadium wasn’t exactly at noise-level capacity, it was still somewhat awesome that his strike call was audible way up in TT territory. After an inning or two he lost steam, but then somebody must have slipped him a little extra Joyce Juice because he belted them out sporadically throughout the rest of the game.

The box score:

MARINERS (7) AT ROYALS (8)

MARINERS             AB  R  H BI  ROYALS               AB  R  H BI
Dustin Ackley         5  0  0  0  Alex Gordon           5  0  3  2  
Ichiro Suzuki         5  2  3  0  Alcides Escobar       5  0  1  0  
Casper Wells          5  3  3  2  Eric Hosmer           5  0  0  0  
Jesus Montero         5  1  2  2  Billy Butler          3  3  3  1  
Justin Smoak          5  0  0  0  Lorenzo Cain          4  2  2  2  
Kyle Seager           5  1  2  2  Mike Moustakas        4  1  2  1  
Miguel Olivo          3  0  1  1  Jeff Francoeur        4  0  0  0  
 John Jaso            1  0  0  0  Brayan Pena           4  1  1  1  
Michael Saunders      3  0  1  0  Chris Getz            3  1  2  1  
Brendan Ryan          4  0  2  0                                    
TOTALS               41  7 14  7  TOTALS               37  8 14  8

MARINERS                      010 201 300 -- 7  
ROYALS                        030 220 001 -- 8  

LOB--MARINERS 8, ROYALS 8. 2B--Casper Wells, Kyle Seager,
Chris Getz, Alex Gordon (2), Mike Moustakas. 3B--Brendan
Ryan. HR--Casper Wells, Kyle Seager, Billy Butler, Lorenzo
Cain.

 MARINERS                        IP    H    R   ER   BB   SO   HR
Kevin Millwood                    5   10    7    7    1    2    1
Steve Delabar                 1 2-3    0    0    0    2    0    0
Oliver Perez                      1    2    0    0    0    0    0
Josh Kinney                   0 1-3    2    1    1    0    0    1
 ROYALS                     
Bruce Chen                    5 1-3    7    4    4    0    6    2
Jose Mijares                      1    2    1    1    1    0    0
Aaron Crow                    0 2-3    3    2    2    0    1    0
Kelvin Herrera                    1    2    0    0    0    2    0
Greg Holland                      1    0    0    0    0    1    0

WP--Kevin Millwood, Steve Delabar, Aaron Crow. SO--Ichiro
Suzuki, Miguel Olivo, Michael Saunders, Casper Wells (2),
Dustin Ackley (2), Justin Smoak (3), Alcides Escobar, Eric
Hosmer. BB--Michael Saunders, Billy Butler (2), Chris Getz.

LOCATION: Kauffman Stadium

CONDITION: Dry

WEATHER: Hot, Clear

Buck seat: W-
Guard: Cops
Anthem: Like a Tuva throat singer, somehow managed to hit two notes at once

Umpires:
H: Joyce
1: DiMuro
2: Reynolds
3: Hoye

Time: 7:10
Temp: 103 (yikes!)

Game 21 vs. Seattle

In chapter 16 of the Book of Judges, Delilah asks Samson for the secret of his strength. In verse 11 he tells her that if she ties him with new ropes that he’ll be as weak as any other man, the idea being that nobody knows the strength of a rope until it’s tested. Then in verse 12 she tries it and it doesn’t work.

Calling a new pitcher up from Omaha for his MLB debut is sort of like that. Like Delilah must have, we all know in our hearts that it isn’t going to end well. But with untested talent, we can at least pretend that we’re going to be pleasantly surprised, at least until we aren’t.

Rookie Ryan Verdugo did quite well against the first two Mariners he faced, even getting veteran Ichiro Suzuki to pop out. Sadly, it was pretty much all downhill from there. He coughed up three runs before finally getting another pop out. Then in the second he went right back to work. Brendan Ryan obligingly went down swinging, but Seattle scored three more times and put runners on second and third before Ned Yost finally made the long march to the mound, replacing Verdugo with Vin Mazzaro.

That’s gotta be a rough experience for a new pitcher. Still, the Royals don’t really have a lot of options at this point. After Monday night’s rout, the franchise designated lefty Jonathan Sanchez for assignment. Verdugo and Sanchez were what we got for Melky “Discharge” Cabrera. Though we didn’t exactly need another outfielder, thus far we don’t seem to have gotten much in return.

And speaking of the Sanchez collapse yesterday, it naturally left the guys in the radio booth bored and in need of something to jabber about. They settled on speculating about whether Mariners third baseman Kyle Seager was related to Pete Seeger and whether their names were spelled the same way and whether Pete Seeger was still alive and whether Pete Seeger was ever bit by Charlie-O (okay, I made that last one up).

For what it’s worth, Pete Seeger is in fact still alive, probably currently at work on a folk song promoting peace, love and understanding among Royals fans. “Inch by inch, row by row, please don’t boo Robinson Cano.” Sung line by line so the audience can learn the words, the Pete method.

Back to the game. The Royals took a stab at a comeback in the third. Jarrod Dyson hit a long fly into the gap between center and right, using his speed to stretch it into a triple. Not to be outdone, Alex Gordon hit one to the same spot with the same result (though the result was closer because Gordon isn’t as fast as Dyson). Then Alcides Escobar singled Gordon in, stole second, made it to third on a ground out by Eric Hosmer and scored on a single by Billy Butler.

Scoring in threes seemed to be the rule of the evening. The Mariners did it again in the fifth, and the Royals did it again in the seventh. By that point Seattle was playing pitcher roulette, bringing in Charlie Furbush (whose jersey made it look like his name was Fur Bush) to face one batter before suffering a fake-looking injury. The new pitcher, Shawn Kelly, gave up a home run to pinch hitter Lorenzo Cain before being replaced in turn by Lucas Luetge.

In a long game on a hot evening, it was a frustrating way to play baseball. Still, eventually it worked for them. Luetge got Escobar to ground into a double play, and that was it for the Royals.

This was one of those quirky games with plenty of odd moments. Hosmer ran way outside the baseline trying to duck a tag at first. Suzuki hit a foul that hit one of the backstop support wires and bounced back onto the field. The fake-looking injury. The back-to-back triples. And so on.

Because biting Pete Seeger is thirsty work

The box score:

MARINERS (9) AT ROYALS (6)

MARINERS             AB  R  H BI  ROYALS               AB  R  H BI
Dustin Ackley         5  1  2  1  Alex Gordon           4  1  2  1  
Ichiro Suzuki         5  1  1  0  Alcides Escobar       4  1  1  1  
Casper Wells          5  1  1  0  Eric Hosmer           4  0  1  0  
Jesus Montero         4  2  3  2  Billy Butler          4  0  1  1  
Justin Smoak          3  1  1  2  Mike Moustakas        4  0  0  0  
Kyle Seager           4  0  1  2  Jeff Francoeur        3  1  1  0  
Miguel Olivo          5  1  2  0  Salvador Perez        4  1  1  0  
Michael Saunders      5  1  2  2  Chris Getz            4  0  0  1  
Brendan Ryan          4  1  1  0  Jarrod Dyson          2  1  1  0  
                                   Lorenzo Cain         1  1  1  2  
TOTALS               40  9 14  9  TOTALS               34  6  9  6

MARINERS                      330 030 000 -- 9  
ROYALS                        003 000 300 -- 6  

LOB--MARINERS 9, ROYALS 2. 2B--Brendan Ryan, Jesus Montero,
Michael Saunders, Kyle Seager, Eric Hosmer, Salvador Perez.
3B--Dustin Ackley, Alex Gordon, Jarrod Dyson. HR--Michael
Saunders, Justin Smoak, Lorenzo Cain. HBP--Justin Smoak,
Jeff Francoeur. SB--Alcides Escobar.

 MARINERS                        IP    H    R   ER   BB   SO   HR
Blake Beavan                      6    7    5    5    0    3    0
Charlie Furbush               0 1-3    0    0    0    0    0    0
Shawn Kelley                      0    1    1    1    0    0    1
Lucas Luetge                  1 2-3    1    0    0    0    2    0
Tom Wilhelmsen                    1    0    0    0    0    1    0
 ROYALS                     
Ryan Verdugo                  1 2-3    8    6    6    2    2    1
Vin Mazzaro                   2 1-3    4    3    3    1    3    1
Tim Collins                       2    2    0    0    1    2    0
Kelvin Herrera                    1    0    0    0    0    2    0
Aaron Crow                        1    0    0    0    0    1    0
Greg Holland                      1    0    0    0    0    2    0

WP--Vin Mazzaro. SO--Brendan Ryan (2), Ichiro Suzuki, Miguel
Olivo (2), Michael Saunders (2), Casper Wells (3), Dustin
Ackley, Justin Smoak, Billy Butler, Alex Gordon, Alcides
Escobar, Eric Hosmer (2), Salvador Perez. BB--Brendan Ryan,
Jesus Montero, Justin Smoak, Kyle Seager.

Buck seat: W-
Guard: McConnell AFB
Anthem: Okay

Umpires:
H: Hoye
1: Joyce
2: DiMuro
3: Reynolds

Time: 7:10
Temp: 98

Game 20 vs. Chicago

Yeah, I have no idea.

So the circus came to town. We saw the elephants and the bearded lady and the lion tamer and the trapeze and the tightrope and the whole thing. I loved it. But I’ve gotta say that it’s a real relief to go out to the ballpark for a plain old ballgame.

And this was a good game for it. Last night was a 14-inning loss that looked no end of painful, so we were hoping to avoid a repeat. At least with Luke Hochevar on the mound, if we got beat it wasn’t likely to be by a one-run margin. He actually got off to a pretty good start. The White Sox went scoreless in the first, threatened but didn’t cash in in the second, and managed to score only one in the third.

Then we answered in the bottom of the inning. Jarrod Dyson singled, stole second and came around to score on a single by Alex Gordon, which at long last is what we actually have Dyson for. Then Alcides Escobar rendered his great base running moot by hitting one into the bullpen in left. Not exactly what we have Escobar for, but quite welcome nonetheless.

And we kept hitting Sox ace Jake Peavey the whole night. He got us in order only in the first and fifth, and we made it at least as far as scoring position in every other inning.

In the meantime, Chicago got to Hochevar in the top of the sixth. Bruiser Adam Dunn led off with a home run that cleared the green wall in front of the scoreboard. Then Paul Konerko scored on a triple by Dayan Viciedo, and suddenly we were tied.

But not for long. With two outs in the bottom of the inning, miracle of miracles: Escobar hit another homer into pretty much the same spot as the first one. That makes four for him for the year, three of which we got to see (and of course two we got to see tonight).

The Sox vaguely threatened in the top of the eighth. Actually Alexi Ramirez hit a single, which normally wouldn’t count as a threat. But then in comes A.J. “Boooooo” Pierzynski to pinch hit. Though such situations usually take full advantage of whatever curse we live under, tonight it must have been slumbering. Pierzynski obligingly grounded into a 5-3 put-out Moooooooose!

In the bottom of the inning we scored two more on some solid station-to-station that brought Jason Bourgeois in to pinch run for Billy Butler and Lorenzo Cain in to pinch hit for Dyson. The three run lead was enough to aim the division leaders’ band-wagoning fans toward the parking lot, and Jonathan Broxton didn’t even pull his usual trick of making things unnecessarily exciting.

What a great way to start the second half of the season.

The box score:

WHITE SOX (3) AT ROYALS (6)

WHITE SOX            AB  R  H BI  ROYALS               AB  R  H BI
Alejandro De Aza      4  0  2  1  Alex Gordon           5  1  1  1  
Kevin Youkilis        4  0  0  0  Alcides Escobar       4  2  2  3  
Adam Dunn             3  1  1  1  Eric Hosmer           4  0  0  0  
Paul Konerko          4  1  1  0  Billy Butler          4  0  2  0  
Alex Rios             3  0  1  0  Mike Moustakas        4  1  2  0  
Alexei Ramirez        4  0  1  0  Jeff Francoeur        3  0  2  1  
Dayan Viciedo         4  0  1  1  Chris Getz            3  0  2  0  
Tyler Flowers         3  0  0  0  Salvador Perez        3  0  0  0  
 A.J. Pierzynski      1  0  0  0  Jarrod Dyson          3  1  1  0  
Gordon Beckham        3  1  1  0   Lorenzo Cain         0  0  0  1  
                                  *Jason Bourgeois      0  1  0  0  
TOTALS               33  3  8  3  TOTALS               33  6 12  6

WHITE SOX                     001 002 000 -- 3  
ROYALS                        003 000 12x -- 6  

LOB--WHITE SOX 8, ROYALS 7. 2B--Alex Rios, Alejandro De Aza,
Chris Getz. 3B--Alejandro De Aza, Dayan Viciedo. HR--Adam
Dunn, Alcides Escobar (2). SACF--Lorenzo Cain.
SACB--Alejandro De Aza, Chris Getz. SB--Jarrod Dyson.

 WHITE SOX                       IP    H    R   ER   BB   SO   HR
Jake Peavy                        7   12    6    6    1    5    2
Hector Santiago                   1    0    0    0    1    0    0
 ROYALS                     
Luke Hochevar                     5    5    3    3    3    4    1
Aaron Crow                        1    2    0    0    0    1    0
Jose Mijares                  0 2-3    0    0    0    1    1    0
Greg Holland                  1 1-3    1    0    0    0    1    0
Jonathan Broxton                  1    0    0    0    0    0    0

WP--Luke Hochevar, Aaron Crow. SO--Adam Dunn, Kevin Youkilis
(2), Alejandro De Aza, Tyler Flowers, Dayan Viciedo (2),
Jeff Francoeur, Billy Butler, Alex Gordon, Alcides Escobar,
Eric Hosmer. BB--Alex Rios, Adam Dunn, Kevin Youkilis,
Gordon Beckham, Jeff Francoeur, Salvador Perez.

Buck seat: H-
Guard: Firemen
Anthem: Okay

Umpires:
H - Tchida
1 - Baker
2 - Welke
3 - Guccione

Time: 6:11
Temp: 97

The All Star Game

The day rolls around at last. A couple of entries back I compared the experience to Christmas when we were kids. Like the exciting holidays of years past, anticipation made it hard to sleep.

And like little kids, we may have gotten a bit too excited. Though the parking lots opened at 10, the ballpark itself wasn’t scheduled to open until 4:00. Thanks to some confusion about what opened when, we arrived way early and ended up sitting for a bit. We found a nice, shady spot, talked, read, and generally chilled. It wasn’t a terrible experience by any means.

Then of course the franchise sent someone out to make us move. So we strayed over to the corporate circus for awhile. The Budweiser Clydesdales tent was shady and not too crowded, so we braved the smell until the lines outside the ballpark started moving (fortunately half an hour earlier than announced).

Our seats felt great. We spent some time just sitting, catching our breath, regaining our bearings, generally acclimating to the whole experience. The American League was taking batting practice, and we watched Billy Butler hit three or four balls over the fences. Just trying to prove a point, I guess.

After awhile Ken and I took a stroll around the ballpark to get some photos. By the time we got back, the National League had taken the field for BP. Among the folks milling around behind the backstop: Mark McGwire, George Brett and Tony LaRussa all at once.

I wonder what they said to each other.

The pregame stuff was extensive, but not as big as I’d figured. The highlight was a brief recognition of Steve Palermo. Though one can’t really judge emotion from way back in our seats (not even with a strong lens), he seemed like he was playing along but would really rather they hadn’t done it.

The rest of the pregame stuff was frankly lackluster. They gave us all T-shirts so we could make the whole stadium into some kind of red, white and blue themed thing (lucky us, we were the red section). The musical act and the anthem singer were both American Idol vets (no doubt at the behest of Fox). Even the color guard was just guys from KU ROTC.

The big letdown was the ceremonial first pitch. Not that George Brett is ever a disappointment. It was nice to see him get some time in the national spotlight. But the rumors circulating around in advance of the game suggested that Michelle Obama or maybe the President himself or at least Joe Biden was going to do the honors.

So then why all the show of paramilitary force?

The lineups were a reminder of just how out of touch we’ve become with the sport as a whole. There were a few familiar names and faces, but they were far outnumbered by the guys I knew only vaguely or had never heard of before. This may be a subject we’ll revisit before the season comes to an end.

The game itself was All Star typical. Justin Verlander started for the AL and gave up five runs in the first inning. The NL scored another three later, but really that first inning pretty well did it. Some good hitting. Some bad fielding. Nobody exactly gave it his all (or even 50%).

 

Still, it was an experience to watch. If nothing else, a few of the guys were wearing really interesting shoes. Safety cone orange with gold toes and soles. Fancy.

Gotta be the shoes

By the end, however, I started to fade. All the substitutions would have made keeping score impossible (assuming iScore would have allowed it to begin with, which of course it wouldn’t have). Deprived of my usual game-watching habits, I found the overall flow – to the extent there was one – hard to follow. By the time another American Idol vet took the field to sing “God Bless America,” the heat, bad food, lack of sleep and the umpty-millionth yelling of “frozen margaritas!” began to take their toll.

Frozen diarrhea! Frozen diarrhea!

So that was fun. Let’s all do it again in another 37 years. Seriously, I’m really glad we did it and that we did it up right, going to all the events. Still, if this was a once-a-year deal at the K, I think I might pass on future occurrences. Having now gone to a Hall of Fame induction and an All Star Game. I wonder how long we’ll have to wait for the chance to see a postseason game.

All Star Weekend - The Home Run Derby

I didn’t drag the cameras to this one, which is actually okay because the main highlight wasn’t visual. It was the sound of 40,000 fans all booing at once.

The issue was lineup selection for the Home Run Derby. Earlier in the week American League derby captain Robinson Cano indicated that he’d like to include someone from the home team on the AL foursome. However, come selection time he didn’t.

Royals fans took offense. A plane with a tow banner fired the first shot, congratulating Billy Butler for making the team and proclaiming that “Cano got it wrong.” Then the real fun started during the pregame introductions. When Cano was introduced by the roving microphone moron, the stadium-wide chorus of booing got underway. The moron even tried “Aw, c’mon Kansas City. Let’s give it up for Robinson Cano,” the response to which was pretty much “We are giving it up for him! Booooo! Booooo!”

Nor did the chorus abate when he came to the plate during the derby itself. The catcalls started before he was announced and didn’t stop until his at bat came to an end, pausing only for cheers every time he made an out. And the outs came ten in a row without a single home run

Let’s start the analysis with a partial defense of Cano. He may not have meant his remark as a commitment. And even if he actually intended to select a Royal, he may not have known that his choices would be Billy Butler and Billy Butler.

More directly to the point, I have no direct knowledge of the behind-the-scenes dealings that go into Home Run Derby player selection. But I have no doubt that Cano chose exactly whom the Commissioner’s office and ESPN told him to pick. At the risk of stating the obvious, the derby is designed to generate ad revenue by drawing viewers, and a player from Los Angeles is likely to do the trick better than a player from Kansas City.

I even felt a little bad for the guy. The fans’ response really seemed to get to him. Though as a Yankee he should be used to getting booed, the volume and duration were genuinely overwhelming. That level of anger over something as trivial as the Home Run Derby probably caught a lot of people by surprise.

It shouldn’t have. Network executives and Yankees fans have no right to be surprised at the outrage engendered by their arrogant disregard for other people’s feelings, especially when they drag their rudeness into somebody else’s home. All the “Royals fanz are teh stoopid” responses ranging from Twitter feeds to the broadcast booth are the moral equivalent of playground bullies who run crying when someone finally gets sufficiently tired of their crap and shoves them back.

Had it merely been the derby lineup, it might not have been all that big a deal. But it’s long decades of this disrespectful crud, culminating with the way MLB and its broadcasting cronies are handling the All Star festivities. A small example: the signage on the video boards that kept referring to the nearby highway as “The I-70.”

But I would have taken all the crappy lineup moves and California freeway definite articles if it would have exempted me from one thing: Reggie Goddamn Jackson in the Buck Seat.

Whomever made that call, here’s an assignment for you: get out a piece of paper. Draw a short, skinny line horizontally near the bottom edge of the page. Then next to it start drawing a box. Draw it all the way up the page. Don’t even stop at the top edge. Just keep coloring onto the desk.

What you’re looking at is a bar graph. The thin line represents everybody with fond memories of Jackson’s days as a Kansas City Athletic. And I do mean days. We’re talking about 35 games way back in 1967, during which he got 21 hits and struck out 46 times, collecting a whopping .178 batting average.

And the box so big it messed up the desktop? That’s all the people who remember Jackson as the epitome of bad sportsmanship, the hateful antihero of the legendary Royals/Yankees rivalry of the late 1970s and early 80s. And this is who we’re honoring in our ballpark? For the love of baseball, even Yankees fans admit he’s an asshole. If Buck O’Neil’s spirit really did live at the K, Jackson would have vanished into thin air the moment he sat down, sucked into nothingness like the house at the end of Poltergeist.

In many ways the All Star experience has seemed a lot like Christmas, especially when we used to get really jazzed about the holiday when we were kids. So at this joyous time of year, we shouldn’t dwell on the negative. Still, MLB could learn a lesson from all this. And in my experience as a teacher, “Yeah, we screwed up” is the beginning of education, while “You gave me an F because you’re mean” tends to portend even more F’s in the future.

All Star Weekend - The Man Himself

And however briefly, all was right with the world.

As he was such a key part of the Legends experience, I thought I’d give George Brett his own entry.

Also worthy of note is that earlier in the day Mom actually got to meet him. Face to face. After all these years. At the end of the morning’s 5k, he was handing out medals to runners as they finished the race. He shook her hand, congratulated her and gave her a medal. What a wonderful moment.

Later he moved over to first.

Like hitting a grapefruit, but he still got a piece of it.

Hangin’ out with the fly-ass girlies

And pretending that a throw to first was too hard.

All Star Weekend - The Legends Game

“Taco Hat” sounds like some kind of meme, like “Taco cat is palindrome.”

 I admit to being a bit nervous going into this experience. Bartle Hall was one thing, but I didn’t know how to react to the All Star hoopla invading our familiar ballpark. It seemed like having someone build a Starbucks in our living room. Fortunately, All Star Sunday proved to be the perfect way to ease into the experience and make it a little less like being eaten by Lion.

We arrived sometime around the middle of the Futures Game. We didn’t need to see the whole thing to achieve our primary goal: getting a good look at AAA prospect Wil Myers. The camera behind the plate got an even better look at him when he fouled one back that shattered the lens.

I told you kids to be careful! This is why we can’t have nice things.

After some between-game filler, we got to the evening’s main attraction, the Legends Game. It turned out to be more fun than I’d anticipated.

Legends and actors and models, oh my.

The highlight of course was getting to see George Brett play again, even if it was just six innings of softball silliness. It was also nice to see Ricky Henderson, Dave Winfield, Ozzie Smith, Rollie Fingers and the rest of the guys from the days when I actually recognized some of the players on the field. Most of the celebrities were a big “meh,” but then I didn’t show up to see them.

The game was mostly a lot of goofing around, which of course we expected. I also expected to find it annoying, so I was pleasantly surprised to discover that for the most part it seemed kinda cute and charming.

Rollie Fingers gets some Gatorade for the ball.

Indeed, the closest it came to annoying was the final at-bat when the crowd started to chant for Bo Jackson to take a turn at the plate. I figured he’d stall for a minute and then go up and take a cut or two. But no, apparently he’s still the Bo Jackson we all know and ... know. He wandered back and forth. He pointed at his hip. Then at long last he gave in on the condition that Dave Winfield would run for him.

So let’s make a list of the problems here. First, Winfield is 11 years older than Jackson. Second, even Rollie Fingers ran the bases for himself (and I use the term “run” loosely in his case). But worst of all, two of the other players were wounded veterans from a wounded veterans softball team. So Jackson’s hip is so astoundingly terrible that he can’t play goofy softball any better than guys who got their legs blown off? I wanted the ghost of George C. Scott to storm the field and demand that they remove this little yellow coward from this baseball field full of brave men wounded in combat.

Jackson didn’t exactly ruin the mood, which remained festive and fun throughout. It was just sort of a reminder of exactly when the Royals started to go wrong (and how such a thing came to pass).

All Star Weekend – The Fan Fest

All Star Weekend activities got underway with the Fan Fest. Our tickets were for Saturday at 4, which was reasonably good timing. We got a good spot in the cathedral parking lot within easy walking distance of the convention center.

Chevrolet’s Tom Sawyer Bench Building Zone

The fest itself was predictable fare, a fairly even mix of corporate PR, memorabilia sales, autograph booths, batting cages and the like.

We made a handful of old player sightings. The most notable was Cal Ripken Jr. conducting some kind of a fielding clinic. We also saw Dennis Leonard signing autographs, and we would have seen Tom Gordon if he’d bothered to show up.

Overall the experience left me with a strong sense of “meh,” but a handful of spots made the trip worthwhile. I enjoyed the Negro Leagues exhibit, the history of baseball in Kansas City, the Hall of Fame exhibit (though that one was a bit crowded) and the collection of MLB’s various trophies.

I also got a real kick out of the display of caps from all the teams’ minor league affiliates. It was an interesting reminder of just how big baseball really is. Every one of those caps is regularly worn by a team that’s the favorite of somebody somewhere.